User blog:Awesomesix/Awesome Rap Battles 17: Slenderman vs Jack Skellington
Okay, so this isn't my first time doing this battle, but I think this version is A LOT better than my first one. Credit to TK for helping me on this one, especially with one verse which me saying would give away too much, but yeah. Without further ado, my Halloween special... Battle AWESOME RAP BATTLES 2.0! JACK SKELLINGTON! VERSUS! SLENDERMAN! BEEEEGIN! Jack Skellington: It’s the Pumpkin King, And the Emcee Jack O’ is steppin’ up, Here to show this tenacious tentacle how to leave fools ever struck, Someone living at the woods and no exposure to modern times, Has no way in hell the chance to step up and drop a decent rhyme, I’ve seen we both work with kids, at least mine can still be found, Step up to the microphone already, and off the playground, Time to take this bitch back to the End and away from the village’s kids, Barely anyone knows you can speak, and trust me, I’m jealous, I rocked the suit and tie, before you teleported in to the horror scene, We’re all glad we can’t see your face, you’d look worse than the Scream. Why don’t you step down already? Your chances were low since your Arrival. The only way you’d get the victory if it was the name of a child! Slenderman: When you took over Christmas, you should’ve given yourself the gift of rap, Cause I’m not scared of a Santa-wannabe who went at it with a sack. Drop the pervert jokes, they’ve gotten old, I’ve had enough of it, Bursting into musical numbers doesn’t scare me, Achmed the Dead Muppet. You? Trying to fight me? I’ve seen your verse; your fighting can’t be great either, That whole pathetic menagerie and lobotomy was less tolerable than Bieber, I’m a dapper phantom, this rap appiration there’s no escapin’, it’s too late when, You hear me spit a verse, cause my words burn worse than Satan, no compensation, My words leave foes evaporating, lyrical emasculation, that’s what you’re facing, Except you’ve got no junk, you Burton punk, made from crappy clay animation, My foes face woes when I step up with my great C.P. representation, Rappers call me the shit, and compared to me your verse is defecation. Jack Skellington: I’ve had it with you, you’re just mad that you can’t sing. You faceless thing. I’ll have you know that when I get laid, it’s not down in a grave, if that’s what you think. Most rappers I know call you the shit, because man, your rapping stinks! Oh by the way, Slender M-A, this was a sting. *Jack flies off in the sleigh, leaving Slenderman standing in a road in the middle of nowhere* Slenderman: Oh, how mature, just leave me jerk, we’ll see how that works. Wait, how did I get here? This looks like a desert, never been here before…wait, what’s driving near? *The sound of a motorcycle engine revving is heard, and flames and maniacal laughter approach quickly* Ghost Rider: Did you sin bitch? You die, bitch! Run before I pull up at your side, bitch! These raps are off the chain, spitting flames, I’m an insane cyclist! I’m a Daredevil, Devil took my soul, had to pay the Shyamalan toll! I’m a Marvel hero, a flaming skull, but lone ranger style’s how I roll! Be glad you don’t have any eyes, or a soul for me to steal, Or else you’ll learn why not to fuck with someone who made the Devil’s Deal! You’re a bigger wimp than Blackheart; a crappy Creepypasta, time to remove this stain. You’re just a faceless G-man, time to for you to make a difference, and teleport away. Even with 15 minutes, your friends couldn’t beat me. No way can you alone top me. All it takes to ruin you is a fanfic. This one man Hell’s Angels there’s no stopping. Slenderman: You’re just Sam Elliot’s apprentice; you’re not even the original; Your effort was minimal, A vigilante? Please. You’re a hotheaded criminal. That flow was abysmal; you shouldn’t have given up your power to seem courageous. I run this game, defeating me lyrically takes more than eight pages. You’re just a dark Skeletor, a bigger skull joke than Brook; I’ll reduce you to marrow, This CGI Cage’s chances are narrow, only product stuffed with fluff than an obese scarecrow. I’m a legendary tentacle, an internet spectacle. This skeletal hectic is forgettable. My era is incredible, this skeletal is too weak for the man who turns fruits like you to vegetables. *Ghost Rider rapidly circles his bike around Slenderman, surrounding him in smoke and blinding him, and when he can see again, he appears on a rollercoaster* Slenderman: What the hell… Mr. Bones: I’m Mr. Bones and you better sit tight, Because you’re on Mr. Bones’s Fantastic Ride! A ride that never ends, like my tormenting vocal ownage, You’re in for a world of pain on my deathly infinite locomotive! Now cower in my presence at the face of defeat! I scare children away when I spit these burns right through my teeth! I’m just saying what’s on my sheet… my rap sheet! That’s right, I got a rep! Now strap yourself in, kiddies, or I’ll snap your neck! I’m a Spooky Scary Skeleton, baby that’s how I do! Can’t take it? I’m just 2spooky4u! Slenderman: What even are you? You seem like another carney desperate for money. You’re like a gag somebody made, but forgot to bring the funny. That wasn’t even a verse against me, just rambling on about yourself, This ride is just a drag, and it didn’t even help. If this whole line up is a joke, then I’d hate to meet the jester. At least it’s better than being called a child molester. Eh, at least these chumps are easy, so I’ve been doing well. But at the rate this is going, I’m already on the 7th level of Hell. *The roller coaster slowly morphs into a place in Hell, with Mr. Bones running off as a shadow is cast over Slenderman* Grim Reaper: Who is this mockery who dared to step to the Gardener of Mortals? I don’t wish to become a portion of my brethren’s silly quarrels. But your desire to urge on has become suspicious and tempting. Your torment here is never ending. Undertaker representing! Your flow is like a Banshee; screaming panicked and raunchy, My flow is like a twisted poem, eerie, hypnotic, grim and daunting. Jaws are dropping, all are watching, time you’re wasting, do not face me, Go outside, don’t be hasty. Troubles come for a man so pasty. Your little menagerie of freaks can’t save you when I come knocking. Your fifteen minutes are nearly up; time’s tick-tocking. You reap what you sow. Like the plague, my flow is contagious. I’m an icon throughout the ages, your mere fame was just outrageous. I may be frail, but I’m a force to reckon; I’m a lethal weapon. With your fanbase starting to deaden, I’m not someone you should threaten. Slenderman: Don’t compare me to the failures, I’m beyond a staple in the genre, You’re just a horrid Yorick, my torrid flows put ghosts like you in trauma, The specter’s getting a lesson in resurrecting a proxy legend, After facing me, a place of obscurity is where you’re headed. I’m a master, I can spit it faster than you can visit victims in minutes. If you pulled every single one of your little friends I still would win this. This satanic Santa’s spitting out banter, your lines brought no damper. I’ve still survived your measly lines, no matter how much you tamper. You’re an overhyped farmer, I’m the cream of the crop. I can’t be stopped. My flows are as unpredictable as explosions, when I hit you with it, your jawbones drop. This man lacking anatomy having the guts to step to me was his last mistake. Out of all the canny rappers the one in a cape takes the cake. I’m classy, flows so ghastly, you’re cheap plastic bought for candy sacking. Remember, when you see me, you’re not dreaming, much longer you won’t be lasting. WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? TUNE IN TO FIND OUT! AWESOME RAP BATTLES 2.0! *Spooky Scary Skeletons plays* Who Won? Slenderman Jack Skellington & Crew Hint: Watsky on Watsky action (kinky winky) Category:Blog posts